The Night Before

I remember when I was little-okay, I guess 5' 3" is still little, but we'll ignore that-I could never sleep Christmas Eve because I couldn't lay still. Anxiety coursed through every nerve, every vein, every follicle of my body until I couldn't stand it anymore. But I had to. I had to lay there and deal with it because there was no other option. (Getting out of bed in the middle of the night on Christmas Eve is definitely NOT an option when you're seven years old and waiting on Santa Clause.)

Years later, I would have a similar feeling as I stood in line waiting to board my first roller coaster. Only this time, I couldn't tell if I was more excited or nervous. Sure there was a lot at stake when I was seven-you never know...Saint Nick could totally get my wishlist wrong-but this was a wild roller coaster I was dealing with! Yet there was this anticipation despite being completely scared out of my right mind.

Now, even more years later, I'm feeling the same way. I guess it's not as exciting as laying as still as possible in order to hear Santa sneak in or as nerve racking as waiting to ride your first roller coaster, but this time does resonate that same sensation. I'm not going to lie, I'm scared out of my left mind for my math final tomorrow, but as soon as I get these horrible, terrible, wicked, evil, unnecessary tests out of the way, I can go home and not even think about school for three entire weeks. Knowing that gives me that inexplicable secret anticipation as I sit here studying, thinking not about my tests, but past them: seeing my family and pets again, going riding with my friends, working on the farm, attending my home church, and sleeping!

I have five days, four tests, three days of work, a two-hour ride home, and I'll be at my one home. I'll be counting down.